the 2nd one.
"And here it goes again, the feeling i got in the beginning of this whole thing, but this time i'll try to deal with this better then before, no hysterics, no falling into depression, this time that will be easier, i just have to make myself believe in it, to make my mind believe in it. No complaining, no tv shows instead of studying, this week will be the hardest for me morally, emotionally, but if i manage to cope with all that everything will be easier after that.
And again i'm thinking about that"
Same thing.